Days UnderDoubt: A Tale of Two Months (of Quarantine) [in One Volume]

Days UnderDoubt #1

16th March 2020

There's an ominous silence in the entire town that was a bustling centre of activity when I visited it last. We are about to have lunch at Café LehVenda (the only Cafe that is still open in the Main Bazaar at Leh) when Kanishka clicks this photo after asking me to pose- and I don't - but I sort of do. I don't remember what I was thinking at that point but I do remember making do with hot water after the cafe attendant said that they were out of Sprite. At minus 7 degrees in the noon everyone had asked for hot chocolate, but I wanted Sprite in the middle of a 'desert'. They were out of cold drink stocks (and tourists apparently). 10 of us had arrived in the non-tourist frozen-Pangong hungry-dogs season in Ladakh one day before. Sipping the hot water in a cold desert I was perhaps thinking about temperature. We'd heard a certain virus was quite fussy when it came to temperature. "Origin, symptoms, cure? Clear Hai?" was the conversation in the room. "Hmm. Sprite nahi hai. Clear nahi hai," I thought- with doubtful eyes staring through the thin air.

Days UnderDoubt #2

18th March 2020

I always thought that if I were ever offered a last wish before being beheaded by Ser Ilyn Payne, I would definitely say that I wanted to take a walk on a frozen Pangong Lake. I never thought I'd be able to do it so early in life. On our way to the Lake and later to Nubra Valley the next day, we were accompanied by 'deserted' roads with abandoned vehicles and soulless campsites. Apart from the hospitality of the Indian Army the only thing that could keep us warm was the excitement to reach a gigantic lake basking in the sun- with the wind 'rolling stones' in it.

I'd never imagined Delhi as a desert though. Thinking of what was in store for the coming days, I guess it was high time to do just that.

Days UnderDoubt #3

20th March 2020

This is the last photo of the Leh trip sent to me by none other than His Excellency peeping-out-of-the-window of this checkpoint that I imagined to be a decent doppelganger of the Breaking Bad Meth Lab RV. Our next stop was supposed to be Lakshadweep- an oasis after the desert. But where were we goin? Back to headquarters- Delhi. The virus had taken the world (and consequently our trip) by storm. "Chemistry is, well technically, chemistry is the study of matter. But I prefer to see it as the study of change," Mr White had once said. There was now a microscopic entity with a novel chemistry now saying, "I am the danger. I am the one who knocks."

Days UnderDoubt #4

22nd March 2020

It doesn't really take much to understand why govt/defence 'quarters' are called so. They are basically 1/4th of the building. And when you don't have neighbours around, the rhythmic scope of your thaali beatings increases by 3/4. And even the number of opportunities to convert evenings into metal (quite literally) concerts multiply. But when the sky is celebrating a day's relief, why enhance the chances of a cacophony that you can hear from a distance? The birds are chirping, the wind chimes are tingling, the pressure cooker downstairs is whistling and the strings of our hearts are tugging in unison as gratitude to those out there who are trying their best to calm a lethal noise.

Days UnderDoubt #5

27th March 2020

I have been getting numerous messages from people anticipating what the lockdown might look like for them. Some say it is going to be their 'Days Underground'. It got me thinking- what was I doing at the same time last year? Or the year before that? In 2019 and 2018? Well, it seems all my Marches were on a hat-trick to be all about staying indoors, following the news, confirming whether spring really exists in Delhi and trying to settle on the fan speed. Evenings on a new terrace is an add-on this year.

Days UnderDoubt #6

28th March 2020

Books and Music are keeping me excited at home as the duties intensify. Working from home and staying put is definitely a privilege. I get an opportunity to wipe the dust off my aging guitar that normally lies sedated in the attic for months. As the Doors of perception play tricks on the people across the globe, I click fingers and virtually wink at my Kim Wexler to say 'It Saul Goodman'. Also, I decide that 1st April would be a great day to go off this platform, so that for 5 weeks at least Saul can focus back to being Jimmy McGill.

Days UnderDoubt #7

3rd April 2020

My dull day is brightened up by a dear old friend's laptop archives. Aditi sends me a bunch of amusing and hilarious pics of us from our time in college. This is perhaps the only presentable among those. She had told me in the very first week that I was too tall to sit in the front. Consequently I became a chronic backbencher: a position of absolute privilege (and comfortable sleep) in college. All I have learned in medieval history classes is probably the number of selfie filters that can be applied by a Macbook. Thanks to Aditi - and the company of who is behind her face in the photo and who was and remains a constant source of humour and heresy :P

Days UnderDoubt #8

Mid-April 2020:

the inflow of old college photos continues through the week. The first one is sent to me by my dearest yaar Usman and it features fellow syndicate member Adrian who is perhaps weirdly relishing the Fifa defeat he has just bestowed on me before the Rikshaw ride from Old Gupta colony on a day before our Graduation ceremony.

The second one is a T-shirt appreciation post by travel mate Gena who locates me trying to attend a Drama competition in college sneakily during my underground days. I don't blame her- she couldn't send the pic earlier due to my lack of access to a mobile phone perhaps.

The third one is what Nishant calls 'The Duality of Man'. Shared by the supremely talented Musa, it shows the dichotomy of graduation- quite apparently.

The last one is a favourite...and I wish I had access to it in these days of Quarantine. The epic lemon soda introduced to me by Sahil at the fag end of college. He informs me that now it is 12 rupees per bottle and not 7 rupees anymore. 'Par taste wahi hai,' he adds. :')

Days UnderDoubt #9

15th April 2020

As the second phase of the lockdown begins, new ways need to be found to keep calm and humour alive in a small home with a 6 feet generation gap (yours truly) between its occupants. A classic timepass is discovered to pass the time while watching how the time passed: old family pictures and videos. That's me and my sis about 10 years ago. They hold the same expressions as we do in the quarantine today.

Days UnderDoubt #10

23rd April 2020

I'm done with the books that I had bought early this year. I must admit I haven't ever had the freedom to read what I wanted to read at one stretch for so long. I had thought that because of their bulky nature, I wouldn't get an opportunity to finish these for some years to come...however lockdown did give a chance to unlock (unleash) the book devourer in me.

What do I do next? Write a review on these? Naaah!

I download Tik Tok on my phone. And for the next 30 minutes my world is turned upside down- I even forget about my existence. I uninstall it immediately- restoring some semblance of my mortality.

Days UnderDoubt #11

4th May 2020

Not so long time ago, in a galaxy not far away at all...

Unpredictability looms large over a species that is obsessed with taking control.

The capricious clouds above- mock them, as there is no control to take.

And that resolves all doubt.

Lie down.

Keep breathing.

And avoid Westworld season 3.

Days UnderDoubt #12

11th May 2020

After recently losing Kenny Rogers and Bill Withers who occupied a prominent place in our car playlist, I rearranged the song sequence to accommodate- in these trying times especially after the departure of Irrfan- the happiest artist on the face of the earth: Udit Narayan (and Alka Yagnik- the combo goes without saying). When you're driving for household chores, you don't have time to focus on the song as you're busy remembering the grocery list. And singing along with the mask on doesn't really work out. Nevertheless, music is integral.

The lockdown has taught me that Mozart goes well with washing utensils and Beethoven goes well with smacking mosquitoes.

Days UnderDoubt #13

16th May 2020

On the eve of Navo's birthday, the cult of Josh Sundaram stands revived. This becomes my first legit Lockdown video conference. The tenets on the meeting's agenda are well-stated:

1. Roast each other as much as possible.

2. Try to focus when Ashlin and Navo start their discussion on Anime while Shivam and Sahil roll their eyes.

3. Do not play around with the orientation of the screen. (-violated, as can be seen).

4. Keep calling Allen.

5. Do not ask the the question 'How's the Josh?' as that will lead to an inevitable breach of the embankments that prevent the flood of PJs by yours truly.

6. Keep reminding Mathew about the erstwhile perils of sleeping late- (while you'd yourself go to ask for curd from thy neighbour at midnight).

Days UnderDoubt #14

20th May 2020

Something to look forward to for the next week. It is that time of the year again. We had lost count of the houses we had changed long ago as it became a recurring affair (just like any other Fauji family). I would ball park the figure between 40-50 quarters. It is going to be our 8th house shifting in Delhi. My mother tells me that my role is simple: "manage your books, they are literally all around the place!" I am glad the next place has at least an almirah for me. Much appreciated.

The weirdest but most fun part of shifting - especially when it's in the same colony- is that for a few days you have two houses. You wake up in one, go to sleep in the other with the mattresses on the floor.

It's certainly a privilege. When millions across the globe are vying for shelter, I am cataloguing piles of paper.

Days UnderDoubt #15

31st May 2020

As we settle in a new place and the world starts to find itself 'unlocking' into a novel situation, I am engrossed in a similar state of mind as a lot of others: doubt.

I had based this series on a streak of uncertain days- they were knowingly uncertain. 'Doubt is an uncomfortable condition, but certainty is a ridiculous one.'

It is a quote attributed to Voltaire.

But I'm not sure. :)

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